11.59pm WASHINGTON DC

BLEAKNESS STAKES
(class x) for billionaire tyrants

prize: planet Earth distance: not long going: dirty weather: heating up weights: fixed penalties: rigged draw: biased

1 (1) DUMP TRUCK 74-17-0 orange gelding by psychopathic sadist out of whore of babylon
form: multiple high crimes and misdemeanours/mass murder/inciting hatred and violence/violation of constitution/catalyst of horrors- owners: infant separation disorder & penis envy trainer: mussolini jockey: facebook  

2 (2) A.N.OTHER 77-11-7 grey gelding by gravitas out of unthreatening
form: 0/VP/VP/0- owners: sane capitalists trainer: kinnock jockey: prayers 

BETTING: 1-10 civil war; 100-1 bar

VERDICT (by Racing Correspondent Dic Turnip): Destructive clown and vicious, vindictive imbecile Dump Truck is as unsuitable as it is possible to be for anything and everything other than the knackers yard. The morbidly obese, multiple bankrupt, tax dodging cretin is only backed by other neo-fascists brutes such as Bolsonaro, Erdogan, Orban, Putin and Johnson. A.N.Other is far superior in every regard and only has to continue breathing to canter to a comfortable victory. However, that means nothing as Dump Truck has already made it clear he will subvert the result by hook or by crook and will never cede power. Things can only get worse.