A man in India has set a new world record for the longest ear hair, nearly 25cm (10 inches).  The cunning sod: he’s making an interesting feature of what to most hommes d’un certain age is an alarming personal tribulation.  Variously sharp, curly, downy or protruding, ear hairs proliferate like billio once a guy gets the wrong side of 40.  If I didn’t have a tweezers permanently poised near my lobes to pluck, draw, unravel, coax or yank (no two ear hairs root similarly, you see) each and every one of the buggers the moment they emerge, well then that grocer from Uttar Pradesh would have to start worrying about his Guinness Book of Records entry.   I wish someone would explain to me why men lose vital head hair as they age but simultaneously gain superfluous ear/nose/eyebrow/back/testicle/everywhere-else hair.  There must be a perfectly rational evolutionary explanation…

they're ready-waxed too