With apologies to E. J. Thribb (aged 17½)

So. Farewell
Then
Dominic Cummings.

You were de facto Prime Minister 
Until the lazy philanderer’s latest
Conquest from the Spectator magazine,
Whatsername,
Objected to your
General
Obnoxiousness.

You will be remembered
As the brilliant political strategist
Who made every 
Previous
Tory
Government
Appear benign, wise and competent by comparison.

What an achievement!

Given that
Brazen law-breaking,
High pandemic mortality rates,
Economic collapse,
Farcical Brexit chaos and International
Pariah
Status
Have made the UK truly
World Class,
Any far-right anarchist worth his salt should be satisfied
With a job
Well Done. 

What next to assuage
And displace
Your Napoleon Complex,
Little Dom?

Remember:
Leave
Means
Leave.
You can still pull the buffoon’s strings
Through think-tanks,
Lobby groups
And Tory donors,
While gaining free time to
Polish that Rebel-Fogey image,
Clear out the tote bag,
Give the gilets and beanie a good wash,
And find a reputable
Facial
Reconstruction
Surgeon
In the Durham area.