Laugh, or else

Before joining the Crusades, an English knight made sure his Lady stayed faithful by fitting her with a chastity belt. He locked the armoured contraption securely and, not wishing to …

Hide and seek

1 One summer afternoon in the long school holidays five children wandered off to have adventures in the countryside. They were all nine-year-olds who lived in the semi-rural outer suburbs …

Anobaith

I despair. No person with a modicum of intelligence, conscience and decency can do anything other than despair in the rotten to the core UK controlled neck and crop by …

Waiting for Pennsylvania

How many beans make five? Five. Correct. What weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of iron? They weigh the same. Correct. Constantinople is a long word. Spell …

They never went away

I feel like Heledd in Cynddylan’s hall, A roofless ruin amid a land ransacked, Or Taliesin seeing comrades fall As rampant Saxon brutes the corpses hacked, Or frightened Beuno by …

Risible

What can I get you, Archbishop? Tea? Coffee? A soft drink? Homemade turnip wine? Something stronger? Give me a large port. Umm…Rotterdam? How about a Bloody Mary? Be patient, Gerry …

Escape route

He waited until darkness fell. In comfortable walking boots, warm clothing and a waterproof hiking jacket with the hood up, he shut the front door as quietly as possible and …